Barrett_Scott_obit

Scott Frederick Barrett

November 20, 1966 - June 2, 2021

My precious husband, Scott Frederick Barrett, died on Wednesday, June 2, 2021.  He was only 54.

Scott and I met on an improbable blind date in 2003 at the distinguished Old Ebbitt Grill in Washington DC.  On paper, we probably had a bunch of things stacked against us.  As a Massachusetts girl, I leaned democrat - he, with his libertarian sensibilities, most decidedly did not.  He was nearly eight years older than me; how could he possibly still be on the market?  And then there was the 350-mile distance between where he lived in NYC and where I was getting my MBA in Virginia.  For sure, my analytical brain was skeptical.  But then, the moments started: his delight at my knowing a surprising amount of esoteric trivia about his beloved Cincinnati Bengals (thanks to fantasy football), his inadvertently squirting the lime from his drink into my eye shortly after we sat down (not very James Bond), and my hand fitting perfectly in his as we stepped out onto 15th St NW to start our adventure together.  From that night on, we were all-in, persisting through the geographical challenges and setting a tone of perseverance that would define our entire marriage.

In our many long weekends traveling together, I learned how he grew up in idyllic Ft. Thomas, Kentucky, where he was blessed with a great set of friends, many of whom still remember him as the dubious president of TNDC (Tuesday night drinking club), throwing toga parties, and sometimes getting stopped by local cops to confiscate beer from the trunk of his black Cutlass (the one with the memorable 'TBONE' license plate).  Good thing Scott never wanted to run for public office.  Though he was all-American in how he loved his Midwest pleasures, especially the hometown tastes - Graeter's Ice Cream, La Rosa's pizza, and Cincinnati chili.  Marital harmony required me to understand:  Dixie Chili over Skyline, every time, hands down.

After high school, Scott buckled down when he enrolled at the University of Kentucky, making dean's list his first semester, then transferring to the College of Engineering.  My sense is this is when the highly focused, diligent version of Scott emerged – very driven and goal-oriented.  Though he certainly took time out to cheer on his favorite sport of all, Kentucky Men's Basketball.  Go Big Blue!  And yes, he still hates Laettner.

After UK, Scott began a successful career with Electronic Data Systems (right, the Ross Perot company with that infamous cat-herder ad during Super Bowl XXXIV).  Over 22 years he rose from entry-level programmer to senior executive leading a $1B+ business with more than 2,000 employees.  His philosophy was to always take on the best, most challenging opportunity, relocating several times in his first decade-plus with the firm (hence why he was still on the market in 2003).  Along the way he made numerous friends, earned an MBA from Duke, and of course met me (thanks to the brilliant matchmaking from the astute Carol DePalma, to whom we owe the happiest days of our lives).

A few years after we married in 2005, we relocated to Plano, Texas for Scott's job.  There we invested in and improved a beautiful home together, learned the difference between 'y'all' and 'all y'all', and adjusted to having the Cowboys as the center of the sports universe (even though my Pats clearly surpass).  Our greatest joys came as our two loving sons entered this world.  Joseph - a younger male version of his mother - is deeply empathetic, incredibly bright, and analyzes all the angles while also feeling very deeply.  And Michael, affectionately nicknamed 'mini-Scott' by some of my co-workers, is a delightful force of nature, lights up every room he is in, and though sometimes quieter than his brother, is every bit as smart, always watching and analyzing, putting everything together in his head.  The boys are so terrifically wonderful, and Scott reveled in the unique specialness in each of our sons.  They love and worship their dad, and he loved them deeply and completely.  Not seeing Joseph and Michael grow up was Scott's deepest sadness as he left us.  Mine too.

In addition to me and our boys, Scott is survived by his father, mother, and sister.  His Dad, Fred Barrett, gave Scott so many things, most notably a deep intellectual curiosity about how things work and the self-confidence to figure things out on your own.  His mother Linda Barrett, known as "Mums", was an exceptional influence throughout his life.  Scott completely adored her - no question she is the source of Scott's deep generosity and kindness, and she taught him the value of hard work, paving your own way, and taking pride in a project well-done.  I have long thought his mom - along with his beautiful and talented sister Amy Cornett, known as "Boogs" (you'll have to ask her why) - is the reason Scott always gravitated toward strong women, something I benefited from every single day.

In the end, Scott's life was taken far too soon by a brain tumor.  Despite nearly nine years of the absolute best medical care, architected by the brilliant and kind Dr. Elizabeth Maher, Scott's strong body succumbed to the ravages of cancer.  So many things I could say about it, but the main thing is brain cancer exposes what you and your loved ones are really about, as people.  It is more than just the arduous medical treatments.  It is the years-long rewriting of his brain circuitry, challenging personality/behavioral impacts, and devastating cognitive and eventually physical effects.  We had to bring strength and grace to every day, re-making our marriage many times.  But it was all grounded in our deep love for each other and our core belief that our marriage was the most important thing. 

I'll always believe Scott's signature strengths and beliefs got us through: his intense, ‘glass is overflowing' optimism, his tremendous generosity of spirit as we continually reframed happiness for him and for ourselves, and finally, his absolute determination to 'say no to the status quo' and fight the disease until there was a better answer.  Tragically, Scott ran out of time.  But until he did, we found ways to persevere, re-invent ourselves, and create great joy centered around the boys, our love, and our continued desire for the same things in life.

We will celebrate Scott on June 7, 2021 at Turrentine-Jackson-Morrow Funeral Home, 2525 Central Expressway North, Allen, Texas 75013.  Our family will receive friends from 9:00 a.m. until 9:45a.m. followed by a memorial service at 10:00 a.m. Information about the virtual broadcast is below.

In place of flowers and meals, we kindly request people consider giving to the Scott Barrett Fight Brain Cancer Memorial Fund.  Scott believed passionately in the promise of research and innovation delivering new treatments and enhanced holistic care for patients facing this terrible disease. We can think of no better tribute to him or comfort to me and the boys than for people to participate. 

For details on the fund, and for those wishing to share stories and memories about Scott, please visit Instagram (@remembering.scott).  Or follow the traffic to see what others contribute about my remarkable husband.  As part of our healing, I will be posting there for a while to share the best of Scott, plus things he and I would have talked and laughed about, were he still here.  I miss our laughter so very much.

To Scott, I say what I am sure he knew:  you have been the greatest source of happiness and joy in my life.  The boys and I cannot imagine our lives without you.  We miss you so much already, and we will love you forever.

In loving memory, your devoted wife, Rebecca

The service will also be live streamed at TJMfuneral.com on Scott’s obituary page by clicking on the following link: https://celebrationoflife.tv/blog/scott-frederick-barrett. After the service, the recorded live stream will be available for viewing at the same link location.

 

 

 

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I was a classmate of Scotts at Highlands. I live in the Dallas area also. I'll never forget Scott's laugh. Chris Sarakatsanis and I met him for lunch a few years ago in Plano. I'm sorry for your loss Rebecca. You wrote a wonderful Obituary/tribute. May god bless you and give you strength. Regards,
John Carroll, June 11, 2021 My condolences to the family. Scott and I attended high school together and my thoughts and memories of him are very fond. Rest in peace, Scott. Corie Dean, June 8, 2021 I’m very sorry to hear of Scott’s passing. I have only great memories of countless fun times. It’s easy to see he remained the fun, loving, loyal guy that I’ll always remember. Gary Hunter, June 7, 2021 Rebecca, my thoughts and prayers are with you all. Scott was a great friend and co-worker! Lots of fun and devoted to his family. So very sad. Pat Costa Pat Costa, June 7, 2021 Rebecca Our heart breaks for you and the boys and the entire Barrett family. Scott was such a great friend. We have so many good memories of him. We will keep you in our thoughts and prayers. Love Steve and Linda Linda Hamberg, June 6, 2021 So sorry for your loss. Your father, Gary, and I have been golfing buddies for many years and because of that I feel I know Scott, you and both of your sons. My wife and I will have a mass said for Scott at St Elizebeth Seton. Date not yet known. Bruce and Alice Bickhaus. Bruce Bickhaus, June 5, 2021